I’ve always thought that I was never alone. Despite not being romantically attached, I am blessed enough to be in the company of my wonderful family, and my wonderful friends that love me, and are always there by my side to take care of me, and to make me feel like the luckiest human being in this planet.

I tried something this week that in a sense, will let me be alone. How does it feel to be truly alone?

I locked myself in my own room, working alone, unwinding alone, and sleeping alone.

What do I feel?

Surprisingly, I was very much in peace. I felt that I was given a space that I’ve never allowed myself to have. I found clarity. I felt rested.

It’s not as if I don’t want these wonderful people around me, for God knows I wouldn’t know how to survive around them, but there’s this thing called a personal journey that I must take alone.

Learn to be alone. Appreciate being alone. Actually hear what my soul tells me. Actually communicate with myself. Most importantly, listen to myself as I get to know myself. Understand.

It’s been a self-imposed madness that I’ve given myself these past few years as I try to shut myself off emotions and it’s time to declutter. I need to be unchained from things that were brought from my own doing. Stop sacrificing and torturing myself and let myself get the chance to breathe some fresh air.

Alone. That’s what I need to be. Let me get back with a changed person who truly knows herself, and most importantly, what she wants.

I hope the blurred vision stops. I think I know how to do that now.

Let me get lost. I think I can manage