Just a few seconds ago, I was staring in disbelief as I read a very, very long love letter.

It was full of emotions - a mix of sadness, longing, and subtle pleas. It professed love in the most courageous way that I could never have said that to anyone.

It made me very very sad, because it was an open-ended love letter, some courageous risk, that one was willing to take one last time, before things would be for the best.

I was definitely more surprised as I realized that I wrote it.

Could it be possible that my heart has thawed from its icy splendor? I’ve been comfortable in the cold for so long, I’ve ignored its state, and I guess I threw it away in a dungeon that I never bothered to check on it again. When I check on it again, could it be that it’s already warm, beating, and very much alive?

In the midst of your life, you meet someone that you feel you are so connected with, as if you had something in your past life. He was the missing string. You think so much alike, have alot of interests in common, and even understand each other in such a deeper level that you don’t understand how someone like that could exist. Your conversations are non stop and overflowing, as if you both feel that a day is never enough. You feel as if you’ve known each other your whole life, and continue knowing each other more. You weren’t a believer of a genuine connection until he stepped into your life. You understand each other beyond superficiality and frivolity - you recognize each other’s souls.

But then, there’s doubt. With all the disillusion that has crept into your being, you just can’t help but doubt. You fervently wished that you met him before you lost your belief in good things, but then, things happen for a reason. A dark cloud hinders your thoughts that things might not be as perfect as that you are thinking. You might just be daydreaming, you thought, and you will fall hard on the ground, and it’s only a matter of time.

Amidst the despair and weariness that you think this madness won’t last, it’s still undeniable that you were able to hear your heart beat. You might think that single beat was just a figment of your imagination, or you were just dreaming, but to hear it beat, is enough proof that you are alive.

I am alive.